I don’t know the Red Sox’s new relief pitcher two ways from Sunday. I’m not familar with him, how many Cy Young awards he has purported to have won, or even how much money the Red Sox managed to scrounge together to get him. All I do know is that this walking beard with safety glasses has cost the Sox 3 very crucial games in August. Games in which the Red Sox were ahead, but lost after he showed up.

My parents and I watched as he blew two games to the Orioles last week. It’s no wonder then that a fellow Sox fan I met at the Philly airport called him “Eric Gagme”. Now being part of the Red Sox Nation, I’m very familiar with defeat. If there is one thing we know, it’s how to take it on the chin, so I feel a bit hardened against the train wrecks this man has caused over the past two weeks. Despite this, tonight’s loss at the hands of the Angels was nothing less than a disaster. The Red Sox rallied back in the 8th to take the lead thanks to Big Poppy and Manny finally firing together like days of old. Then Gagme comes in and makes a royal mess of the entire situation. Him, combined with some of the worst calls from a home plate ump New England’s ever seen, conspired to hand the Sox a loss just when the Yanks seem to be coming out of their losing streak.

So from this NC Sox fan, I’d just like to sincerely suggest to Mr. Francona that you get back all the money you spent on this scruffy looking Nerf herder, and figure out a way to clone Papelbon before it’s too late.